What is True Friendship? Well, true friendship is broad and inclusive. It should exist between husband, wife, lovers, employers, employee. And in fact, it encompasses everyone and everything ~ plants, animals, all of life, all of the energy force. We should consider no one a stranger to ourselves. We should learn that everyone is akin to us, or has been in one lifetime.
Family love is merely the first lesson in love. When we’re born, when we’re babies, as we grow up. It is the first lesson in love and friendship. How to start feeling for someone else, in this case, our mother and father. It must then expand to include our relations, neighbours, workmates, friends, acquaintances, until it does encompass everything that is alive on this earth planet. Only then can we say that we have true friendship. Because we must remember that friendship is a part of love, in fact, I believe if one can be a friend that one can truly love. But one sometimes can love without truly being a friend and I would like you to look at that difference.
Selfish attachment to a single individual excluding all others, prevents the development of Divine friendship. And because of its un-Godlike closeness can breed jealously and possessiveness, which are both very destructive forms. The force behind these are enormous as we see in life with other people. We can see what jealously and possessiveness does to others. So we need to scatter our love, friendship everywhere to everyone.
It is not possible for all to begin with to know and love all human beings and other creatures personally and intimately. All you need to do is to be ready to smile and shed the light, a friendly service over all living creatures whenever you happen to meet them.
This does require mental effort and to be prepared at all times, in other words, unselfishness, give ourselves, our time, our love, our friendship when it is needed to others.
Be like a diamond and reflect light, not like charcoal that reflects nothing.
To have friends we must be a friend. Quite often I’m asked, well, I don’t have many friends, why is it that a lot of people have friends and I have none? Well, sometimes we can say friends are acquaintances when there is a difference. Acquaintances are chance people we meet, occasionally. Friends are those we see more often, get to know better. I believe that they do not have friends because possibly they do not put themselves out, give of themselves. And to give, then you receive. So you have to be a friend before you get one.
When perfect friendships exist between two hearts or a group in a spiritual relationship, such friendship perfects each individual. And that’s interesting because not only does it perfect oneself, but the other person as well. Why? Because we are giving as well as receiving.
Human love and friendship have their basis in service on the physical, mental, or business plane. They are conditional and may be short-lived. Blind friendship with selfish and unthinking persons can end in blind hatred.
Divine love, which also includes the friendship, has its foundation in service on the spiritual and intuitional planes. And it is unconditional and everlasting.
Do not agree with a friend if he is wrong; rather suggest another viewpoint or say nothing. Otherwise you are no true friend. Unwise people argue. Friends discuss their differences. They don’t say, “Oh you are wrong,” they say, “Why do you think that? What makes you believe?”
And normally by this discussing it will be discovered whether you yourself are wrong or they are wrong.
We should love our enemies. Far better to conquer by love of the heart of a person who hates you than vanquish them by vindictiveness, which is completely non-progressive and does spiritual harm to both.
A friend who can apologise when necessary has attained a definite spiritual development and is a friend. For it takes real character to be able to apologise gracefully and sincerely, and it is only pride that usually houses a feeling of inferiority and does not allow us to do so.
If we want to improve ourselves, improve ourselves to become better friends, then we need to see that we have good company, better company. A sage once said, “Good company is of paramount importance, as it influences your reason and will, which by repetitions of good thought and actions form good habits.” This is a very good, important thing to remember.
That is why they say like attracts like. Friendship is a universal spiritual attraction. It can manifest in two or in many persons.
The Spirit was one. By the laws of duality, it became two – positive and negative. Then by the law of infinity applied to the law of relativity, it became many. Now the One in the many is endeavouring to unite the many and make them One. Which really means that those separated possibly from being good friends by being negative, if we applied the true laws, we can find that we have many friends and realize that we are at one with them. And then in our spiritual progress, we become as one because we understand, we love, we are friends, true friends.
Only mutual effort to build wisdom, spiritual and intuitive understanding can bind two souls by the laws of everlasting Divine love. Anyone who fails to inspire confidence in other hearts and is unable to extend their friendship to other souls cannot hope to expand their consciousness into Cosmic Consciousness.
You may not wish to do this, you may say, I just want friends. But you still have to be able to be a giving person, an understanding person. If you cannot conquer human souls, you cannot conquer the Cosmic Heart of God. So it is.
Go in peace and God be with you.
This Article is taken from Mata Yoganandaji’s INSPIRING TALKS #